Feedback and advice.
Some people use the terms interchangeably. If you look at the most basic definitions, though you see that they really aren’t all that similar:
- Feedback: “A reaction or response to a particular process or activity.”
- Advice: “An opinion or recommendation offered as a guide to action, conduct, etc.”
The words hold very different connotations for your employees. Consider what you “know” if your colleague John says, “I need to give George some feedback.” I’m guessing what you “know” is that John needs to tell George how something didn’t go so well. If you hear John say, “I want to give George some advice,” you might assume that George requested John’s advice, right?
In other words, most of us think: “Feedback” is bad. “Advice” is good.
Feedback isn’t (or shouldn’t) always be bad
I have often written or spoken about the importance of offering feedback. More important, however, is that feedback should be balanced—both positive and negative—and focus on past performance while also offering guidance on the future. That combination leads to a far more useful model for what feedback can and should be, and dispels the idea that “feedback = negative comments about past performance.”
How often do most people seek out, and truly want, feedback, given its tarnished image? How many of your employees have asked for it? Many people dread feedback sessions and would never request them. However, when it comes to “advice,” people are often wide open to it, because it helps them improve.
You can shift people’s perceptions of “feedback”
First, realize that if your intention is solely to give feedback about a negative performance, behaviors or actions, consider that your message is unbalanced. You will likely only focus on pointing out problems, therefore, your feedback will be less helpful, more poorly received and potentially counter-productive. However, if your intention is to help people improve (e.g., offer them advice), than you will approach the conversation differently. People will learn that feedback sessions aren’t so bad, and they won’t come to them with their defenses already up.
You must give both feedback and advice in order for your communication to have the best chance to be received as it is intended.
Timing is everything
Remember, your job as a leader is to communicate with people so that they best receive your message. That means that the words you choose and when you use them is everything.
For example, telling people you need to “give them some feedback first thing Monday morning” might not set the receiver up to be open to or ready for your communication, even if it is mostly positive. They will be worried all weekend about what you might say. Scheduling a meeting to “Discuss X, Y, and Z” is more specific and less scary. Provide them with an agenda, and ask them to come prepared to discuss the topics. That helps to ensure a two-way conversation, while allowing you to offer some constructive feedback and advice, without it feeling like punishment.
The bottom line is that you must provide those you lead with observations and data about their past performance, including what is going well, what might need to change (feedback), and how to improve (advice). That will nurture their thirst for improvement and have them looking forward to your feedback sessions, rather than dreading them.
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