Today’s Resource Recommendation is It’s Not Just Who You Know by Tommy Spaulding.

I was introduced to the author, Tommy Spaulding, a few weeks ago when he was guest co-hosting a radio show when I was a guest. (Mondays at 3 in Denver Colorado).

I quickly liked him as I listened in to the segment before I was on. During my segment we talked about books (mine and Tommy’s) and we talked about my practice of regularly reviewing books on my blog (like now). At the time, I had already Googled Tommy in prep for the show and knew about his book; in fact, I had ordered it.

After the interview, I moved the book up my reading list, and I’m glad I did.

A few weeks ago I reviewed a book (How to Click with People — see my recommendation here) that was compared to How to Win Friends and Influence People ,  the classic by Dale Carnegie. This book has similar references; in fact, the author credits it several times in the book as the formation of his thinking on the subject starting in high school.

This book takes some of Carnegie’s ideas and expands and deepens them, using a very engaging style as Tommy talks about his life and the relationships in it.

While far from an academic book, the core idea for me centers around what he calls the Five Floors of Relationships, starting with the first floor (transactional relationships) all the way to the fifth floor (the Penthouse) of close intimate relationships.

He uses this model and metaphor throughout the book, giving the reader suggestions based on real life examples.

I like Tommy and I like his book. While not everything in this book will be new to you, how often is that true anyway? More importantly, the book describes and encourages ideas you aren’t doing even if you “know” them.

This book can help any individual build relationships more effectively – at work, as a leader, and in any other part of your life. The easy-to-read and engaging story telling style will appeal to those who aren’t hard core readers as well. I enjoyed and learned from this book, and I believe you will too.

This isn’t How to Win Friends and Influence People, but I believe Carnegie would like it, agree with it, and endorse it.

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Kevin Eikenberry is a recognized world expert on leadership development and learning and is the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group. He has spent over 30 years helping organizations across North America, and leaders from around the world, on leadership, learning, teams and teamwork, communication and more.

Twice he has been named by Inc.com as one of the Top 100 Leadership and Management Experts in the World and 100 Great Leadership Speakers for Your Next Conference. The American Management Association named him a “Leaders to Watch” and he has been twice named as one of the World's Top 30 Leadership Professionals by Global Gurus. Top Sales World has named him a Top Sales & Marketing Influencer several times, and his blog has been named on many “best of” lists. LeadersHum has named him one of the 200 Biggest Voices in Leadership in 2023.

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