When you ask someone a question and they respond, “It depends,” how does that make you feel? Does it make think the person is blowing you off or hedging their bets? Do you wonder if they are non-committal or not as knowledgeable as you thought? It could mean any of those things. Or it could be a sign they are wiser than you realized.
“It depends” is sometimes derided as the perfect consulting answer – for all the preceding negative reasons.
If the question is who was the U.S. President in 1961, “It depends” isn’t a helpful answer. Because John F. Kennedy is the correct answer. But so many of the questions we might ask, at work for example, aren’t so clear cut.
I know we value decisiveness and confidence. But we value honesty and wisdom too. Let’s explore the value of this simple two-word response.
When to Say ”It depends”
Here are some situations when an initial “It depends” might be the best answer…
- When there are competing priorities
- When there are differing points of view
- When the criteria for deciding are unclear
- When there are unknowns in the system
Look at the preceding list. Doesn’t this describe more work situations than not?
Getting Comfortable Saying It
Being willing to say “It depends” means that you are slowing down past an initial response. It also means you recognize that either the situational context or the feelings about it need further exploration. Rather than seeing “It depends” as a weak answer, see it as likely the best answer until you learn more.
“It depends” also takes the spotlight off you and onto the problem, challenge, or question. When we can get past our ego, even just a little bit, we will probably get better results.
How it Can Help You
Saying “It depends” can help you in at least these ways…
- It gives you time to take a breath and think.
- It gives you the opportunity to learn what others think.
- It helps you build understanding and commitment across the team.
- It helps you look deeper into the situation rather than making snap decisions.
- It allows you to open up a conversation.
- It allows you to take the focus off you and put it on the decision or answer.
Mostly, it allows you to explore why “It depends” and come to a better answer.
The world is complex with lots of moving parts, and not all the answers that are required can be Googled. When you know that context and situation matter and are complex, step back. In those situations, an initial answer of “It depends” might be the best possible answer.
0 comments